mental health – Peaceful Reader

Order among the chaos

Wow. June has been a terrible month nationwide because members of the highest court in the land chose to rule by religion and self-interest over what is right and in the best interest of the majority. Open carry gun laws, overturning Roe vs. Wade, and now tribal rights showcase the absolute right wing nature of the court which should be neutral or at least with some form of equality of viewpoints. I’m afraid for what comes next, like really afraid. We need to regroup both parties. I seriously struggle with how many people are still blinding following this snake oil salesman Donald. I feel disgusted just typing his name and it blows my mind that he added three (Gorsuch, Kavanaugh, and Coney Barrett) of these conservative judges to the Supreme Court.

It’s mind-blowing to me that these judges elected by a twice impeached president will sway the court for years and years to come. And don’t get me started on the many reasons Clarence Thomas should be removed from the court and as well as Brett Kavanaugh. So I’ve been upset this past week along with many other humans. Our voices need to be heard because why should my daughter have less rights than I did as a young woman. So I needed to focus on something else for the time being because if something is messed up in the government house then it is time to place your own house as top priority.

So I’ve been organizing like crazy to keep my sanity. I’ve cleaned up the two kids bedrooms upstairs that no longer house kids. I have stacks of books to donate and boxes for Goodwill. I’ve also worked on reorganizing my kitchen-I feel like for me, with a small kitchen, this is a constant activity when I need space or time or a mental break from the outside world. My spice cupboard is overflowing, my general pantry needs help, and I’ve recently cleaned out my fridge. All this cleaning made me reconsider what is necessary in my kitchen. So let’s compare lists:

Fridge necessities:

lemons & limes
Smart Balance Vegan butter
unsalted butter
quality Caesar and bleu cheese dressing (like from the produce section)
Romaine lettuce (organic)
Spring Greens – I miss my big city market where I could grab what I needed like a bulk item instead of the clam shells. Luckily, it’s summer time!; I have some growing in my garden box.
A variety of berries
Tamari Sauce
Oat Milk
organic firm tofu
red and yellow peppers/broccoli/cauliflower
a variety of hard and soft cheeses
capers
miso paste
Tahini sauce
almond butter
ginger root
sour cream
Greek yogurt in vanilla and plain (I can get these from a local dairy which is great)

Pantry essentials:

Target Blue chips with chia seeds (funny that this was the first thing I thought of!)

Lots of dry storage-bulk items like large bags of Jasmine rice, jars of dry beans, quinoa, oatmeal, chickpeas, red and brown lentils and most of this gets stored in large canning jars

Back up cans of black beans, kidney beans, garbanzos and cannellini

cans of Italian whole tomatoes and some pasta sauce

variety of pasta like bucatini and Asian noodles

cans of corn, tuna, chilies, and green enchilada sauce

dark chocolate in bars and jars of semi-sweet and dark chocolate chips (bulk)

I have a box for flour (I buy unbleached flour and always have a back up bag in case I start to make bread a large jar for Turbinado (raw) sugar

fresh garlic bulbs

new potatoes (red or yellow)

cashew and almonds nuts

variety of sparkling waters

Freezer items:

I keep frozen limeade ready in case I want to make margaritas for friends

non-dairy ice cream

bags of fresh corn

bags of fruit

That’s a lot of regular stuff in my kitchen but my favorite thing is being able to make a recipe without running to the grocery store. And all this organizing is keeping me sane with all the conflict in the world. We don’t have time to heal from one event before the next moment is shattered. What’s in your pantry? What’s keeping you sane?

The Choice: Embrace the Possible

Dr. Edith Eva Eger’s memoir is a deep look into what it was like to live through extreme trauma and survive. At 16 Edith was sent to Auschwitz and was herded into one line with her sister and watched as her mother was pushed into another line, one of death. Edith and her sister Magda fight one minute, one hour, one day to make it through their ordeal together. In four parts, Prison, Escape, Freedom, and Healing, Dr. Eger’s shares with us what her own experience was like as well as patients she has worked with who have been imprisoned in other ways. She lets her journey be the guiding force to helping others. I enjoyed her family story very much, as well as her work with patients. Several of the patient accounts made me cry. It is always difficult to read first hand accounts of the Holocaust; the details overwhelming, and painful. I highly recommend her story and want everyone to read it. It’s an critical reminder of how important our freedom is and that we should never take it for granted.

I’ve discovered that I’m baking more these days and I think it is a stress-reliever. Baked goods for mental health! I made this delicious Czech breakfast cake one morning and shared it with friends and another day I woke up really early and made this French apple cake (Once upon a chef) for a trip to Iowa City to see Groovy Girl (Groovy College Student?). I will make both again. I’ve discovered a new little recipe spot on Bon Appetit called It’s Just that Simple! It’s like family recipes that they just talk you through as if they are telling you a recipe over coffee. I made the Desi Omelette one night for a quick dinner and a Korma recipe another night. It’s my kind of easy recipe site-like I’m getting them from friends.

(French Apple Cake)

Reading three books: Untamed by Glennon Doyle, my friend Angelle’s book, Wrong guy, right room, a fun romance book-find it here on Amazon, and The Guest List by Lucy Foley.

Be safe out there. Wear your mask. Stay positive. Do everything you can to get out the vote. Last night’s debate was even more proof that our current leader is completely unstable.

Looking for hope

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Some days I feel like I am crushing this online learning “thing” with my own home routine but some days it looks a lot like hell. I know many of you are feeling this way also. As a teacher that act of going off to work Monday – Friday kept most every day compacted with very specific roles. I did often bring work home to get a large project finished but in this new pandemic world my work day is often very mixed in with my home life which was fairly active but quiet. I feel like I have dozens of balls in the air and I’m multitasking too much. Some of my questions are: am I spending too much time on school work, how can I do the school work more efficiently, and how do I figure out new technologies to make this flow? I wonder about starting a book club online via Google Classroom for students in upper elementary to access when they want, will they access it? I don’t want to be doing extra work and have students already engaged with too much through their classroom teachers, maker space challenges put out by our district, and activities from other special teams. Plus I have a few special students that I am constantly worrying about…

{Online dance class T-Th}

It helps when I start most days with a little bit of yoga and getting dressed. So Monday-Friday I am going to just get that on my calendar and do it. And then I want to set up a school day that I can deal with mixed in with taking care of my family. My husband and his crew were all laid off from our community theatre and so he is often bouncing around the house, moving from project to project, and he has Zoom meetings which is two steps above the tech chain for him so I invariably have to help him get on and he has to use my MacBook Air b/c his old MacBook is too old for Zoom.

My daughter, our beloved Groovy Girl, has already emotionally had a tough year and then this happens! Like for real, it is too much for her to bear. She’s had a week of online dance classes that went okay but I honestly don’t think she is getting much schoolwork done. For someone suffering from anxiety or depression this is major ordeal. I thought she would love it but she is spending too much time in her bed bemoaning the loss of her senior year. We are working with her on creating a schedule for herself and breaking the day up into manageable pieces. How is this all working for you? From preschoolers to teenagers to college students this pandemic will have such long lasting affects for our children going beyond who gets it and who doesn’t.

Good food is a huge draw in our family so I made her a Dutch Baby Pancake to cheer her spirits and it did for about one hour.

I share with you today a lovely poem by the amazing poet Mary Oliver:

“Wild Geese”

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees

for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body

love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain

are moving across the landscapes,

over the prairies and the deep trees,

the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,

are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,

the world offers itself to your imagination,

calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —

over and over announcing your place

in the family of things. ~Mary Oliver

I love her writing and hope this poem can cheer you even for an hour or two. We will get through this together and we will be smarter for what we’ve learned.

The simple things in life…

I have quite a few things swirling around in my personal life which are creating this need for me to return to some basic human needs for me; like yoga, meditation, and making bread.

Last Sunday I made 5 loaves of rustic bread. There is something so simple about pouring the four ingredients together. There’s an order to it. You begin with level teaspoons or tablespoons of yeast and you pour cups of soothing warm water over the yeast with a few sprinkles of sea salt. It’s almost mystical as you watch it start to bubble and froth after a few minutes. While it’s heating up I start measuring out cups of unbleached flour. One wooden spoon stirs it all together and then I use my hands, covered in some flour, to knead it around a little. My recipe doesn’t require this step but I like it. Just don’t do it too much. Before you set it aside to let it double in size shake some olive oil around the dough and the bowl. I only kept one loaf here; the rest I gave away to friends at school. Bread makes people smile and think of home. Sometimes people make chili for their family because you made the bread. It’s a win/win for all involved.

Meditation has the same effect. I like to sit on my bed right before going to bed and make some space in my brain. I can do it on my own but I’ve discovered three cool apps to help me as well. I started with Headspace created by Tibetan monk trained meditation teacher Andy Puddicombe. (read an excellent review here @ The NY’er) I like this app and it’s guided meditation with Andy’s British accent. I like that it gives me prompts during the day like “your meditation today can’t wait until you get home” or other little motivational moments to inspire you. This one has free basics but you have to buy a subscription to unlock more content. I probably won’t ever buy more I’ll just keep using free because I like what Andy has to say.

During an online conversation with my friend Erica, she shared that she uses Insight Timer to meditate daily so I downloaded that also. This one is totally free. I love that it gives me a more traditional meditation experience through bells, gongs, and wood blocks to begin and end my session. I don’t love that if I miss a day (which I do) it starts back over. So if I miss one day but have meditated five other days it still logs me as “day one”; I want it to appreciate that I did the five days. It’s still a great app and I’ve become accustomed to using both at different times of the day.

I met with my friend Lori for a drink and I mentioned meditation and she told me she was doing a 21-day thing with Oprah and Deepak so now I have that downloaded as well. These are longer sessions and to be clear I have yet to finish one but my heart is in the right place and I will get to it.

In between, I have been doing some yoga to keep my bones mobile and stretchy. I especially love how my arms feel after a few downward dogs and planks.

What do you do to stay stress-free? Drinking wine can also be helpful especially if good friends are involved. Salud!

The very unique Hardscrabble family in The Kneebone Boy by Ellen Potter

Oh, I am having so much fun reading this week, getting books off my to-read shelf that have languished too long. I thought this one was going to be all copycat Lemony Snickett(poor, poor orphan children) and while it does have some similarities, the Hardscrabble family is very unique.

“There were three of them. Otto was the oldest, and the oddest. Then there was Lucia, who wished something interesting would happen. Last of all was Max, who always thought he knew better. They lived in a small town in England called Little Tunks.” (1)

It is written in a very meta-fictive style in that as the reader you are talked to in a certain, knowing way. Their father has to go out of town on a supposed business trip and sends the children off to London, to an aunt’s house. Once they arrive they find only the cat sitter who made the mistake of pretending to understand what their dad said when he called to make arrangements.

Their aunt is truly on holiday and the cat sitter won’t let them stay (she doesn’t know them after all!) so they spend one scary night in London and then head off to their Great- Aunt’s house near the sea. It’s quite a journey and once they arrive their Great-Aunt is not what they expect at all. They have a small castle to explore and they find themselves pulled into the mysterious kneebone boy fiasco, which really all leads to what the Hardscrabble children really need; answers to what happened to their mother.

I found this book to be wonderfully quirky and I could think of a whole list of students to recommend it to because you need a unique mind to enjoy the Hardscrabble’s as characters as well as their unique journey.
I found it so refreshing when the children find out (although Otto remembers) that their mother has been dealing with her own mental health and that that is where the father goes every time he sets off for a trip.

Ellen Potter breathes an unusual life into Otto, Lucia, and Max, creating this story and I wouldn’t mind hearing more about their adventures. Take note of the cover above and realize you will find yourself returning to it throughout the story, checking on details about the children-like Otto’s scarf, wrapped so tightly around his neck, as though he is continually cold. Details. Explore Potter’s website