Long road toward feminism

I think I’ve always considered myself  a feminist even though I may not have dug deep into what that meant. It came up a few years ago when I took a class about gender norms and had the opportunity to think about what makes a feminist. The movement may have started with women’s desire to vote and have their voices heard – and we still struggle with being heard and taken seriously. We still have a long road ahead of us so we need to keep marching.

I think one of the most important issues of today is about choice. Women deserve to have the right to choose what happens with their own bodies. Planned Parenthood, which the name implies, provides access to health care and contraceptives. When I was in college we were given good positive information about choices. I remember there was often a large bowl of single wrapped condoms that women could grab with out causing a stir. That bowl didn’t promote sex or promiscuity; that was already happening! It offered the chance to be safe.  I remember friends in college feeling ecstatic they could go to PP and get health care far from their family doctor who may or may not have judgments on decisions 18-20 year old makes. The religious right made that bowl of condoms go away.

I also had sex education class in high school which helped to dispel anxieties and teach accurate information. It was gross to sit through it, yes, but we understood you couldn’t get pregnant just by touching. Looking back at this I was raised at a time when sex wasn’t controlled by church and government. It was a smart practice that has fallen away because of religious groups and these groups have worked hard to make sure we don’t have good, inexpensive access to basic health care which many women buy into even though it works against them. I wish they could understand how it keeps all women down and beholden to men -white men specifically – who’ve worked hard to keep us from thinking for ourselves.  

I’m not an advocate for abortion, no one is, but we cannot live in a world where back alleys and scam doctors are a women’s only choice.  There will always be accidental pregnancies, health problems, cases of rape or incest and even women who have had enough. Should we help young women understand the ins and outs of their bodies in a more open approach? Absolutely! Abortion shouldn’t be used as contraception but also then don’t make it so hard for women to get contraception.

This post was inspired by an ad I read about voting your faith. I clicked on it because it was an ad at at the top of a teacher website which annoyed the hell out of me.  When I clicked I got this checklist for why one should vote for Christian values.  I say if you are voting for your values you must think beyond abortion-it’s a string they are pulling you along by-and stand up and actually ask yourself deep down how would Jesus want people to be treated? People who might not be like you still deserve to live free of cages, free of humiliation, free of bullying, free to live their own lives.  That’s what a feminist is to me: one who understands the only way the world can truly be in balance is if women are completely equal to men. 

Here it is, 2020, and we just elected our very first woman to the second highest office in the land. It’s exciting and I’m celebrating, yet there is the feeling of what took us so long? Really asking, “what the hell took us so long?” We need more women in politics and, as Brene Brown would say, they need to have strong backs, soft fronts, and a wild heart.  

**I’ve been editing this post for a few weeks now, coming back to it, rethinking what I want to say and I’m ecstatic to be able to add that last paragraph about VP-Elect Kamala Harris!  It gives me great joy. I think of my daughter, and all the daughters and the young men, who will see a woman as a leader, equal, in a partnership with the president. It gives me hope that in the not too distant future we will look upon a woman as president, capable of leading, with her heart. And there will be much rejoicing throughout the land…

The end is always the beginning

It’s the end of Kindness Month and Black History Month (check out this link for our youth poet laureate) yet those two celebrations should continue on everyday. You know what else should continue? Kids going to school everyday in a safe environment. Sometimes it is THE ONE place where children do feel safe and increasingly we keep making it scarier.  Practicing for a tornado drill is very different from actually participating in a dangerous intruder drill. It’s not remotely fun to talk about a dangerous intruders with lower elementary students (or any student).

The idea that we can’t get an assault weapon ban done in this country is really, truly beyond crazy to me. It is a mental health issue as well; I do understand that yet the two go together. Ban assault weapons (not hunting rifles or hand guns, mind you) and make mental health care part of routine wellness care. Both of these items would show that we care for our citizens. We don’t want people to be target practice; we want people to feel well in their heads and hearts.

I’m unbelievably proud of the Stoneman Douglas students who’ve rallied, resisted, and shared their thoughts. I’m happy that Stoneman Douglas students were also able to head back to class today so as to get back to the routine of going to school. This personal account made me cry.  It’s disgusting that they will forever have the memory of friends dying near them and the sound of rapid gun fire in their hallways. According to the NYT after Sandy Hook, 400 people have been shot in more than 200 school shootings. That’s a terrible statistics for America, for our young people, teachers, administration and parents. People should be even more fired up than they are. I do appreciate Dick’s Sporting Goods stepping up and making a change; it could be more but it’s a start.

And don’t even get me started on the ludicrous idea of giving teachers guns. I’m working with students all day long. They are in and out of the library, my office, the back work room and in this safe and loving environment there is NO room for a weapon to be sitting ready for the next shooter to come strolling in to our space. I think the same for every classroom and office in our building and in every building across the country. Ain’t no place for weapons. Now those that represent us; find another way to make schools safe again.  We should be focusing on kindness and learning, thinking, and creating.

If I was Queen of the Lunchroom…

My district gives us the gift of Good Friday.  I’ve enjoyed this day with all of my heart.  I got up a little later than usual and made breakfast in my jammies,  The look on my son’s face as he was preparing to leave and noticed I was still in plaid, flannel pants was priceless.   After much kissing of daughter she set off on her bike with my husband lagging behind.  Usually I walk with them but her riding the bike makes it much less fun.  I had a mission in mind anyway.  I crawled back between my aubergine sheets and read, The Queen of Kentucky by Alecia Whitaker, and drifted between reading and sleep.  I love drowsy.

My husband brought me a bowl of cereal and cuddled with me for a few minutes before he left for work/church and I was able to read 5 more chapters (laughing out loud several times under the covers) before crawling out from the warm covers.  I dressed in Saturday clothes (Gap pants with side cargo pockets, Gap oatmeal long sleeve tee and a long cardigan) and took the straightener to my fat hair.  Off to the mall to gather some Easter basket treats.  I love picking pretty Spring items for my kids.  I don’t even bother with the basket now that the kids are bigger.  I use baskets from around the house.  The Easter bunny has even been know to use clay pots for his treats.  I finished at the mall and headed home to grab a snack.

On the rare days I’ve had off and she doesn’t Groovy Girl and I love to have lunch together in her cafeteria.  She’s brings her lunch 98% of the time.  She’s a picky eater and not much on the lunch menu appeals to her.  I’m not happy that she is such a picky eater but I’m glad she chooses our lunch over what the school has to offer.  Today sitting at the small round table with a gaggle of giggly girls I (again) am mortified as to what is served to our children.  Well, not my child, but most of the kids in the cafeteria were eating school lunch.

Today’s fare was either a huge slice of greasy pizza or 2 huge cheese bread sticks and a cup of vanilla ice cream. The bread stick in the photo actually has more cheese than the ones I saw today and they truly didn’t look done.   On several of the platters there was a large scoop of formerly frozen strawberries, which is at least a fruit or had been, but not one plate had any veggies.  The bread stick kids had a small container, fast food style, of marinara sauce for dunking-was that supposed to be a veggie?

Not only was the food not healthy but this is how the kids ate it:  the ice cream cup was opened and eaten first.  A few that had the strawberry mix added that to ice cream cup and stirred. Hurrah-they accidentally got one serving of a fruit that was also probably sugar-laced!  One girl at our table poured some of her chocolate milk into her ice cream.  All the 4th grade girls at our table had the bread sticks; not the pizza, and they ate some  of the heavily-breaded sticks after downing the ice cream.

If I was queen of the lunchroom I’d make a mandate that you’d have to bring up your almost empty tray to get an ice cream cup.  If I was queen of the lunchroom though they’d have a delicious tray of food, filled with veggies and bright colors.  While I can’t blame the kids for eating the ice cream first-who am I too judge dessert first-but I find it appalling as to what the “experts” call nutritious for an afternoon of learning.

Not to brag but here’s what Groovy Girl’s frog lunch bag contained;  a turkey sandwich on whole grain bread, a small container of grapes, a small container of baby carrots, a clementine, and an organic juice box.  I could tell she was a little green with envy as she watched her friends scarf down vanilla ice cream, or chocolate /strawberry-infused ice cream but she quickly turned her attention back to her own lunch.  We shared the clementine and the small handful of blue chips with flax that I love.  One bonus was that she (and the other “brown baggers”) get to sit first while the other students wait in line for their lunch-her sandwich was mostly gone before the lunch trays were sliding across our table.  She only had to nibble at her other healthy food choices as she conversed with her friends.

I don’t have a cool phone or I would have snapped an amazing photo of this lunch adventure instead I borrowed my photo from this blogger, Eat Hoboken, who wrote about school lunches back in 2010.  Click the link to check it out.  Too bad she’s not still chronicling her journey.

I don’t know if Groovy Girl’s school and my school have the same lunches but I constantly look at what the kids at my school are eating (esp. book club days) and am sad that no vegetarian option is available.  Public schools need  to find funding for better food choices for our children.  Hyping them up on sugar and carbs is no way to learn. Have you ever read about what professional sports teams eat and now even college-level players?  They are working hard to make sure their players are eating well for best performances.  Why can’t we get that for our youngest generation?

On reading; I finished and loved The Birchbark House by Louise Erdrich.  What took me so long to pick this book up, I’ll never know but it was wonderful to read.

Blessing on this Good Friday.

It's Official

I feel like I should host a grand opening, or have a parade!  I am a dot.com now and my old address should still be swinging you to my new address but just like the post office occasionally makes a mistake…please make a note of my new address.  Thank you.  I want you to keep reading.  My blog lists never did come back so I’ve been slowly adding back…don’t worry I haven’t “defriended” anyone.  Eventually I will have recreated my favorite reading spots. 
 While grocery shopping two days ago I walked out with only two essentials from my already short-list.  I had plastic overload!  My tofu comes in a plastic package, my favorite orange juice comes in a plastic jug and my son’s favorite nitrate-free turkey dogs come wrapped in a double layer of plastic wrap crap.  Luckily I was able to get the chocolate we needed for cake baking in a cardboard, recyclable box.  My husband reminded me that we used to drink orange juice from the frozen cardboard tubes-not as yummy but it’s not plastic. 

Why am I banging my head about plastic, you ask innocently enough…because I made a promise to not bring in any new plastic into the house just a  day or two ago.  The proof is here. I’m committed but I had a glimpse into how difficult it will prove to be.  I asked the butcher at our local grocery store about buying turkey dogs from behind the counter and he chuckled…yes, he did!  I hope what you are passionate about is easy to come by this week!

Poetry in Motion

Yesterday

Send #1 son off to state XC meet;
He wouldn’t eat breakfast.
Took 8-yr-old to skating lesson,
watch her twirl.
Smile.
Head to Target, Hobby Lobby,
and Staples to
find things I need for school; 
Sticker shock at the inflated prices
at Staples.
A project board (it’s cardboard, really!)was three times as
much as the very similar one at Hobby Lobby-both big box chains!?
Why, I say!? 
Does noone at Staples go comparison shopping??
Step Down off the I’m-not-crazy soap box.
Breathe.
Drive home, make pb, honey 
with a smidge of nutella
sandwiches.
Road trip across the state to XC Meet.
a perfect mystery that had me on the edge of
my less-than-comfortable car seat.
Love husband who always drives.
Smile.
Watch 7 varsity boys from small school take State!!
Woo!  Woo! Woo! (jumping up and down).
A perfect day to be wearing black and orange.
Drive back home, read more of Buying Time.
Make massive bowl of  popcorn for dinner.
Breathe.

Watch this week: Tuesday I review Buying Time and Pamela Samuels Young has a guest post here!  Right here at Peaceful Reader.  I am in the process of switching from a blogspot.com to just a .com but I’m having a few technical difficulties so I hope you can always find me.  Pamela Samuels Young’s website.

Oh, Saturday I Embrace You!!

Patricia’s Pickles at Brownies for Dinner

     I know another Saturday will roll around in 7 days but it will be just the regularly scheduled weekend Saturday, not this fantastic summer Saturday  I am blessed with today.  I’ve been to the farmer’s market, bought some small cucumbers and 4 red onions and I’m preparing to make bread and butter pickles, for the very first time!!  I know-the thought is overwhelmingly scary-Are you just a little nervous for me…

     I’m going to use this man, Drew Kime’s help.  When I googled bread and butter pickles his site, How to Cook Like Your Grandmother appealed to me on a soulful level.  Plus he has pictures and a sense of humor (or at least he writes with one.)  I have about 10 projects I am trying to finish up to give me a sense of satisfaction for my summer:  How many do you think I can complete this weekend???

1. Bread and Butter Pickles
2. Organize certain clutter zones in our house. (about half done)
3. Continue to work on alphabet book (check)
4. Finish many books on my tbr pile (hmm, could have done better but I have been reading)
5. Lesson plans (school) (not)
6. Flip charts(school) (not)
7. Yoga every day (well, that back injury got in the way but I’m back at it)
8. Laugh a few more times with my children (check)
9. Eat ice cream (almost) everyday (YES)
10.  Have everone ready for school by next week and the week after that. (darn close)

   Yesterday I took my kids on a school shopping adventure to the Mall where we visited many stores and had a late lunch/early dinner in between.  We found a backpack for my tiny dancer at The Children’s Place-she picked from the “boy” rack of BP’s- a purple/blue choice with skull and crossbones!  Hey, I’m so glad she took a step away from pink and picked something so unique.  At the inexpensive shoe place she found slip-on sneakers that (almost) match.  I didn’t want to mention they were boy’s as well but hey, she loves them.  For her gym shoes she did pick white ones with a silvery/sparkly swoosh so she hasn’t completely gone over to the darkside.

    Teen-age boy was in a good mood (you know that’s rare if you also have a teenager:) and found sneakers he could live with at the more expensive shoe place but they were on sale so it was a go!  I have a new dress code policy this year (I cannot go into details because it really mortifies me that I have a master’s degree and someone far superior to me has to tell me how to dress-well, it just raised my hackles)  I can say it… “I have trouble with conformity.”  We cannot wear “open-toed shoes” to school so no fancy sandals to match the heat.  I had to shoe shop a little and found a great pair of Merrell’s on sale.  Does anyone else work in a school district that dictates what you wear??  Share with me please so I can have a little hope that this too shall pass and I will live through it unscathed!   Truly it’s hard to be calm about this!

     I have several finished books to discuss (The Girl Who Played with Fire, Rainbow Jordan and The Girl Who Could Fly) and have to finish That Crumpled Paper Was Due Last Week before our family meeting on Tuesday night.

     After today I hope to cross off number one on the list; bread and butter pickles!!  I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!  I hope mine will look half as good as the picture at the top and still be edible. 

So what do you have planned for this glorious Saturday??

Time for change-Watch Food, Inc.

     My family has had an amazing weekend with both my moms here and our other long distance teenage daughter.  After the craziness of yesterday; bike race, bridal shower, 3 graduation open houses (this is what happens when your husband works with youth in several different capacities) and a feast of a dinner that I whipped up last night-today (Sunday) was a day to kick back a little.  I’ve still managed to do some loads of laundry, hanging some on the line outside to dry and finishing yesterdays dishes, I was able to read in our backyard hammock for over an hour-I did fall asleep for some of that time but oh, well!  As the wind blew up and seemed destined to storm we headed inside to watch Food, Inc., which has been on our shelf for some time now.  We’ve seen Fast Food Nation  and read several books on the food crisis in our country but this one brought added knowledge as well as frustration, fear and a renewed interest in making the best food choices we can make.  This topic generally brings wrath and fury from odd places but it is one of such great magnitude-we eat every day and it seems like a basic human right to know the food we are eating will not kill us. 

If you are unfamiliar with Food, Inc. written by Robert Kenner– here is a synopsis from IMDb:

Did you know that it only takes 48 days for a chicken to go to market. Is this natural? This film explores how food is grown, and the concerns that people have, such as the e-coli outbreak that seems to happen every year. I am a lover of meat, but after this film you will want to change some of your practices like switching to Organic etc. This film also explores demand for certain products that are not Genetically modified.


We all have to eat but we can make decisions based on facts, instead of based on perception. People need to be aware that their consequences may have dire repercussions, so if you need to eat, and we all do, then go out and see this.

Me:

     I’ve been a local  food advocate for years, which began at my grandmother’s sink, watching her rinse vegetables from the grocery store in her sink with a cold water bath mixed with some vinegar (who needs that fancy veggie spray).  I feel blessed to come from a long line of happy gardeners, who’ve paid attention to where food comes from.  I’m a huge fan of any farmer’s market and have made my husband stop, while on vacation, at fruit and veggie stands just to pick up some local produce and he does, because he has a similar family background.  This movie made clear again how important it is to know where our food comes from because everyday chemical companies are selling us processed food for profit.Of course they are trying to make a profict-they’re in business-but it is hard to fathom how deep it runs and how they just do not care. 

    This documentary traces our food controversy to Iowa corn farmers and the farm bill, which gave birth to High Fructose Corn Syrup (a very yucky sugar substitute made from corn and produced to make food cheaper to purchase).  Since my husband is a runner,  he read about HFCS and how prevalent it is so many, many products.  Check your bread, cereals, granola bars-even things you might think of as “healthy” and you still might find the dreaded HFCS as one of the number one ingredients.
    The meat industry is the next focus and how all that “cheap” Iowa corn is shipped across the country to cattle feed lots.  Cows aren’t meant to eat corn and we are forever changing species to fit the needs of these huge companies.  Chickens farms (those massive productions) run by Tyson and Purdue are shown up close.  One farmer takes us  inside her huge chicken house and shows how many of the birds die (so many crammed together) but also how these poor chickens can hardly walk more than a few steps because they’ve been genetically modified to have larger breasts.  The chickens literally topple over after a step or two.  This is the part where I start talking to the” television”!!
 

Much of the same ground is covered in  Super Size Me by Morgan Spurlock and King Korn, though Food Inc. presents a broader picture of our food problems and as my son said, “this should be required high school viewing.”  People need to know this stuff so if you haven’t watched this movie or any others about our deterioting food systems, I encourage you to watch one because one will lead to another as  you will want to know a little more.  It is disgusting but crucial and critical. 
Many of us can make a difference with our buying power-everyday.

Take a stand; Take a difference.
Plant a garden.
Buy local.
Support farmer’s markets
and local farmers.
Buy organic.
Read labels.
Take a step away from fast food.

     Pay attention to legistation about food. Within the last few years the word” natural” lost any real meaning. Products sold as natural do not really have to be natural…just partially natural. what ??? i’m not kidding!
Spend time online researching companies where your food comes from-many of them have slick ads showing
how green they are, what great strides they are making but browsing websites gives you articles such as this one.
Other helpful websites/blogs:

Local Harvest.org (helps locate a local market/CSA near you)
The Healthy Palate blog-I discovered this lovely little blog while researching this post.
Moms Rising website/blog
Okay, I’ve had my say…
Have a healthy Monday!!
Next up in our informative movie viewing-The Cove.

Little Bee Activism

We don’t want to tell you WHAT HAPPENS in this book.
It is a truly SPECIAL STORY and we don’t want to spoil it.
NEVERTHELESS, you need to know enough to buy it, so we will just say this:
This is the story of two women. Their lives collide one fateful day, and one of them has to make a terrible choice, the kind of choice we hope you never have to face. Two years later, they meet again – the story starts there …
Once you have read it, you’ll want to tell your friends about it. When you do, please don’t tell them what happens. The magic is in how the story unfolds.  ~Good Reads Synopsis
This is the warning that comes with the book and I plan to stick to it but that makes it difficult to actually review and/or talk about the book other than with people who’ve already read it.  My thoughts are if you can handle the reality of this book then you should read it. I think it should be required reading for everyone.  
 We are blessed to live in a country where our civil rights are guaranteed.  Justice is not always what it should be here in the states but our biggest problems stem from natural disasters, stock market prices and occassional groups of terrorists rather than kangaroo courts.   We haven’t had an actual war on our soil for about 146 years. Yet in many countries human rights issues are very real and often insane.  I do believe that we live in a much larger global world than our parents’ generation but we still have only  a vague view on how business is conducted in many countries.  Chinese workers get paid aproximately $3.00 a day for producing goods sold at stores here in the U.S. And when a country rich in oil sells that oil through a corrupt and greedy government the people of the land are the victims in so many ways.  When we pump gas into our cars we don’t see the long history of what it took to get that oil here.  We need to pay more attention to how that oil steadily streams into our internal combustion engines. With BP’s recent oil spill in the Gulf Coast we should again, unrelentingly, be looking for alternative ways to fuel our cars.  We should find a way to make trains efficient at transporting us all over this country.  Instead we continue the status quo while people in oil rich lands continue to suffer, despite the oil, because of their opressive governments and big oils willingness to deal with zealots, and we don’t really know the half of it. 
Seriously read this book because “when the men come” we need to be less oblivious and a little more prepared!! 
We all need a Little Bee and a Batman in our lives to remind us the world needs our help.
Click here for Chris Cleave’s website.
Be Peaceful~

Thinking

     I am a member of two book clubs, one that meets with food and wine and the other is three of us, meeting through letters and emails.  Both groups are reading Little Bee by Chris Cleave.  The in-person group met this past Monday  night and I wasn’t able to go.  My wee girl had gymnastics and my teenager had an at-home soccer game.  I make it to every home game I can because, well, because I want to be there.  My husband had a theatre group performing at the exact same time these other events were going on so I didn’t make it to book club or yoga for that matter.  Life is crazy busy and wonderful! 
     I digress as this post isn’t about how busy my Monday was but my reading of Little Bee!  The only reason book club comes into the conversation is that I’m sad I was not there to be part of the conversation about this book.  I’m not ready to review it yet as I still have three chapters to go but last night I went to a very casual fund-raiser for our local food bank and ran into another book club member.  I asked her about Little Bee and what she thought.  She said she wasn’t quite finished with it but she didn’t like it.  I was a little shocked!  It is well-written and she is a retired English teacher but there was more to it.  She said from the very beginning she was hesitant because she knew it was going to have yucky stuff in it.  Yucky stuff being the real life trauma Little Bee and other immigrants experience-first in their own countries and then again trying to immigrate.  I’m not picking on my book club friend but it did start me to thinking; Are some books just to real???  Too gritty!!  Too filled with the reality of how harsh our world is?? 
     I love the story Chris Cleave tells-it is fiction yet the horrors of her experience are very real.  I also loved Ismael Beah’s A Long Way Gone; memoirs of a boy soldier!  Do your prefences run towards gritty?  Or do you prefer milder fiction?  Not so much real life mixed into your fiction?  Just curious…