writing – Peaceful Reader

Hot, Hot, Hot

We are in the middle of a June heatwave from Colorado throughout the Midwest and probably across the US. So it’s hot outside and the Trump administration (if you can even call it that) is trying to make us hotter. The “Big Beautiful Bill” H.R. 1 is ridiculous and frightening. First of all who names a bill that?

And then if you look at what’s in the bill it seems like even many Republicans would take issue with raising the debt ceiling. And cutting Medicaid and Medicare, adding more money for ICE thugs, more money to the Pentagon, canceling green energy initiatives, and renewing fossil fuel subsidies. All this is bad enough but adding in the sale of public lands as Trump’s idea of solving the housing crisis is absolutely absurd. Horrible, despicable, and completely unhinged. When will Congressional Republicans begin to care about their constituents and saying NO to Trump. 71% of Americans disagree with the sale of public lands.

I had a relaxing morning reading at home before heading off to my local farmers market and yoga class. All lovely, peaceful and privileged. When I came home I started making phone calls though using the 5 Calls app. If you’ve not used this yet please consider downloading and using it every day. I’ll be calling all week long to complain about this bill.

Now I want to focus attention to the book I finished this morning. Where Wolves Don’t Die by Anton Treuer is an excellent coming-of-age Native tale of Ezra Cloud of the Wolf Clan. Ezra has a run-in with a neighborhood bully at school and chooses to punch a locker instead of the bully which sets in motion a chain of events that opens up Ezra’s life in a new way. Treuer’s writing is poetic and I loved the characters so much. I wanted to be at the community feast to celebrate Ezra’s first kill. I wanted to sit at the kitchen table and eat Grandma Emma’s wild rice dish.

A friend purchased this book at Birchbark Books in Minneapolis and shared it with me. The book brought out a lot of emotions for me, thinking of my own ancestors who I hold dear. I highly recommend this charming yet real tale of Ezra and his family. Treuer has a long list of nonfiction books but I hope this story is the start of more fiction from him.

Make some calls, stand up and complain, all while staying cool.

Storms

(The Patch)

What if today was the last day I saw my daughter? If she blew away or I blew away. Would she know how much I love her?

The dog sits on high alert trembling next to me. The sounds are shooting all around us. It’s dark as dusk out even though it’s only 4pm.

I went down the wrong way on a one -way street last weekend and my mind keeps repeating this. Accidents happen so quickly.

I was hit once going through an intersection. T-boned they say, like the steak. Our Volkswagen Jetta station wagon tipped over and was pushed a foot or so up the street but the police issued me a ticket. They waited while I was in the emergency room. I’d just picked my daughter up from after school care at her school. She had blood on her arm and kept saying “It’s my mommy’s blood” after they pulled her out the back window. Scared and crying; “It’s my mommy’s blood” on repeat.

Years pass. Has the storm passed? The dog is calmer listening to Alexa’s piano selections. I refuse to turn on the television just to hear all the flashing weather reports. I can hear it outside. I refuse to go to the basement also although I did go down just to take the laundry out. There are no comfy spots to relax with the scared dog and the old dog so I’m upstairs in the family room. Listening to the rain come down hard and the wind blowing the trees on the side of the house.

I was in another accident years ago in my 20s. It was dusk and an elderly man stopped confused by the red turn light even though he was in the lane with a green light. It was an icy Minnesota winter night and four cars behind him slide into each other, boom, boom, boom, boom on the bumpers. No one was hurt although I think the man’s ego was severely bruised.

Clear across town my daughter texts “on my way home” through the torrential rain and I think about the water rising on the roads and the teen drivers all leaving the water park. I would ask her to stay put but I know she is anxious to be home, here with me on the sofa with the dogs listening to piano muzak.

I see my Prius in the dark driveway getting a free carwash. I’m still thinking about the tall trees that surround the house, most of the time like a protective forest but now like a timber ready to take us out.

Driving doesn’t look safe as I check the front window, water filling the roadway as cars swoosh their way through.

What if today was the last day I saw my daughter? If she blew away or I blew away. Would she know how much I love her?

I recently read a stream-of-conscience novel and I wanted to try that style of writing as an experiment. We had heavy storms the other night with 49 tornadoes touching down in this area. I wrote this in the dark with a flashlight in the back of an old book because I didn’t want to disturb the shaking dog. Enjoy.

It's over (for now)

I’m not talking about the pandemic naturally but the 2020-2021 school year. What am I going to do with all this time on my hands now, you ask…? People have this assumption that teachers sit by a pool and day drink through the summer. That may be how some educators spend their time and it doesn’t really matter. I would love to be that free!

My time will be spent doing homework for two classes from Advancement Courses. One is on kindness and the other is on questioning. Lots of homework, lots of thinking, lots of writing. Hopefully I’ll have great finished products and plenty of new learning. I am looking for new skills to get me through the next 8+ years of teaching!

I am also doing something totally new this summer-I’m going to have our Hansen Library open five times during the summer. I’m excited about this new challenge and also fighting the urge to cancel it. As a teacher-librarian I love my students and I love my books! It’s like I’ve created my own living nightmare and I shake myself awake only to find out that all the books have gone missing. Ugh. But it’s going to be okay because they’re just books and their kids! It’s all part of the deal. A few missing books won’t hurt.

I have a lot of summer reading to do as well; books on my nightstand, dresser, bookshelves, etc that have been waiting to be read and books that I need to read for school for our Iowa Children’s Choice Awards.

I’ve made a promise to myself and others that I will complete 13 writing pieces this summer and I’m going to work on that as well. I have far more than thirteen so it’s just a matter of picking and editing. I will crack open a bottle of champagne when this becomes a reality because it’s about time.

Throw in a vacation and a few road trips and that about sums up my summer. I promise I still have time for day drinking by the water-a lake preferably! What about you?

Huge gap

I’ve been diligent over the past months to post once a week and I’ve failed on this through this first half of January. What began as, I assumed, a simple cold quickly became so much more and as December ended and the week to return to school approached I decided to get tested for Covid-19. I didn’t have the major symptoms of loss of smell or taste but I did have a cold that defied all my natural home remedies and proven in the past methods of alleviating a cold. It was a lot of deep symptoms and the worst was that we were homebound over the holidays and could not pinpoint how we picked up this terrible virus. Not only did I feel terrible physically but I was angry because we’ve been so careful all throughout this pandemic.

The only highlight was that we’d made it through the Christmas holiday feeling good. It doesn’t matter that I spent New Year’s Eve on the sofa in my pajamas with a box of tissues near me instead of a glass of champagne. I did have an extra week off from school because of how I felt plus my positive Covid test. I went back to school last week and made it through the week with fairly flying colors. I did crash once I made it home but that’s okay. I wish I could say I feel great but that’s not the case; I’m still sneezing, coughing and tired. My husband shared the same symptoms with me and he still feels exhausted. Somehow our Groovy Girl did not get sick and really did a fantastic job of taking care of us. She is going to make an amazing healthcare professional when she finishes school. I felt really blessed that she was still home for her winter break. We all know (most) husbands are not great caregivers and mine was busy being sick himself. It was good to have someone else here who has a gentle hand and a thoughtful heart. She’ll be gone after next week and I hope by that time I feel 100%.

While I’ve been sick I’ve read a few books of course and streamed a little. After watching all of Bridgerton while I was curled up in bed I set a goal to get caught up on The Handmaid’s Tale. I’d lost the thread after a few violent and too close for comfort episodes so I shelved it for quite awhile but recent events got me fired up and I am now finished with season 2 and ready for season 3. With a lot more laughter I finished up Schitt’s Creek and will go back at some point and rewatch all of this series. Laughing out loud is a perfect way to recuperate or stay sane through a pandemic! We also enjoyed the adaptation of our favorite author Chris Bohjalian’s The Flight Attendant on HBO.

Right now I’m reading Deathless Divide, the second in Justina Ireland’s Dread Nation series and Caste by Isabel Wilkerson. I would love to see Dread Nation and Children of Blood and Bone turned into movies.

I’m anxiously awaiting Inauguration Day because I’m very excited for Dems to be in the WH but most importantly for Kamala Harris to be sworn in as our very first female VP. I’m anxious for our country, for the protests but I have to hope for the best. Welcome to 2021.

Charlson Meadows Retreat

As the calendar page flipped I had an out-of-the-box experience that ended November and ushered in December. Last weekend I had the most amazing experience. I took part in a writing retreat at the beautiful Nancy Nelson Lake House at the Charlson Meadows Renewal Center. My sister-in-law, Stephanie, asked me if I wanted to go with her and her writing partner/friend, Carey. To give myself space I even took Friday off so I had time to drive to Minneapolis, drop Groovy Girl with her cousins, and carpool to the retreat center in Victoria, MN.

This space is breath-taking as you enter through the solid doors where we were greeted by the program director, Nicole. After a short guided tour of the rooms, we were able to select our own bedrooms, unpack and look around at our leisure. The inside of the home is beautifully decorated with art pieces throughout the house.

The retreat center sits on 142 acres of land situated between Zumbro and Stone Lakes. It was snowy and cold for this retreat but the maps of the grounds look beautiful with three labyrinths, hiking paths, meadows, wetlands, and a beach area. I look forward to exploring the outdoors there when everything isn’t frozen (meaning any other season other than winter) yet watching the snow come down on Saturday afternoon was an ethereal experience.

Arriving on Friday afternoon we had time to relax and unwind before dinner was served at 6pm. Before the meal, we sat in front of one of many gas fireplaces and introduced ourselves to the 12 other writers in attendance and then we adjourned into the kitchen to scoop up the delicious offerings by Tena, the local caterer for most of the weekend. Each meal was carefully planned with a good attention to detail. While beef medallions were offered on Friday night the three vegetarians had delicious pasta to enjoy. In the morning we woke to fresh caramel rolls, quiche, and a large bowl of fruit. We shared some meals at the large dining room table and other meals were more casual as we gathered around the island in the middle of the kitchen. Eating was a highlight; the food was wonderfully prepared and I was filled with gratitude to have someone else cook for me. I realize how much energy on a weekly basis I use for meal prep in my house so this was pure joy. I didn’t even have to empty the dishwasher!

Between meals, we were given the gift of time to write spreading ourselves out in the various common rooms in the lake house. The house was built with solitude in mind so while you are working at one end in the library you cannot hear anyone else working or chatting in rooms across the way. My group of three gathered in the library space which had a sofa, comfy overstuffed chairs, a desk, and a fireplace.

We did one group writing activity after dinner on Friday which used prompts to get us loosened up. It was low-key and interesting to hear everyone else’s writing ideas. I headed to bed after that and felt motivated enough to write for another hour or so in the comfort of my secluded room. The rest of the weekend flew by with delicious meals, good conversations, and lots of writing time.

This is a lovely place to spend a weekend and I plan to go back for another writing retreat and I’d love to take part in one of their one-day spiritual journeys. Check out their website for more information on their offerings. Thank you to Stephanie for extending the invitation and thank you to Nicole for your seemingly effortless abilities as a host. I feel better for what I accomplished over the weekend and just simply knowing this place exists.

I did some digging after exploring their website myself and found information on Lynn Charlson, an inventor, and the benefactor of the retreat center. He sounds like an interesting character and I’m sure it is because of his creative energy that the retreat center is infused with such magic.

Cleo Wade

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This week I was privileged to sit in the same room with Cleo Wade, poet extraordinaire and self-care guru. The room in the Graduate Hotel, downtown Iowa City, had a coffee shop vibe with lamps lit for soft lighting and lovely decor. The walls were “wallpapered” with real pencils so you felt like you were in a room meant for writing or writers. Our chairs faced a small stage with two easy chairs and a lamp and this is where Cleo eventually came out to chat with us. While we were waiting we could (and did) have a glass of wine and some homemade Iowa popcorn prepared and shared by Iowa native Kate Greer, one of Cleo’s friends-the upcoming Cheerie Lane Popcorn. It was mixed with real rosemary buds and tasted delicious.

At about 6:30 Cleo arrived on the platform and talked about life to us. She was soft-spoken, natural, and calm which caused the audience to lean in just a little. She is all about peace, love, and joy and how we can all bring that into our daily lives. In order to share these feelings out to your community, you need to feel them about yourself. She preaches an unusual idea of self-care; it’s about what feels right for you. It’s not about what you should be doing but what is right for you. Netflix, a warm bath, and red wine might be what you need on a Saturday night instead of a night out with friends or another spinning class. Learn to pick well at any given moment for yourself.

Here is her BIG Three:

Therapeutic Ritual-This is a little gift to yourself. Always should feel authentic. We need to learn to console ourselves to be our best selves.
Dedicated Safe Spaces-Places you go to replenish your soul. It might be outside, it might be the movies, it might be your own home. Make sure to visit often.
Relationship Boundaries-Choose your people wisely. Steer clear of toxic relationships. The people you surround yourself should build you up and inspire you.
While these aren’t exactly brand new ideas Cleo has a way of saying them to us and her 446k insta followers that make us feel ready to love ourselves a little bit more forever.

She is also an activist and encouraged everyone to vote and get involved right now. Through her Rock the Vote/Gucci’s Chime for Change website, she’s made it very easy for people to connect and get voting information.

Her stop in Iowa City is one of many on her Courageous Love tour which is more than just a book for Heart Talk; Poetic Wisdom for a better life. She was purposeful in making it a free event with stops in all college towns. While her focus does seem to be on younger souls this audience was a very mixed age range and many of us waited in line to speak with her-she chatted, hugged, laughed, took photos, and signed our books with a constant smile. The night was inspiring and I would love to be in her presence again. And thank you to my friend Rita for your willingness to take off on this adventure with me. Thank you to my sister-in-law Stephanie for sending me the info about Cleo’s tour.

Other places to find more Cleo:

Instagram: @cleowade
Cleo Wade
On Oprah
New York Times
Mind Body Green article and another

Reading and Recipes

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I made yogurt this weekend after one failed attempt. Truth: It takes the whole damn day-you’ve got to be prepared for that and I don’t always have a full day to spend with yogurt so I try to sandwich it between things which is why every once in a while it doesn’t work for me. This time I had one failed attempt-stayed milk-poured it right back into the Hansen’s jug used by my husband for his morning cereal. Second time-score-creamy, happy yogurt ready for my morning breakfast.

I also made a curry dish today and soaked chickpeas for the recipe. I found the cauliflower chickpea recipe on The Wholesome Fork and read about the proper method to soak chickpeas on Inspired Taste. I like it when I can prepare a whole meal without opening a bunch of cans. I used fresh tomatoes and some leftover coconut milk saved in a jar in my fridge. It was good and spicy and there’s enough left for lunch tomorrow. While blog surfing I found this great post about my chickpea love just a few months ago.

I picked up a book, Shadow Mountain; a memoir of wolves, a woman, and the wild by Renee Askins, from one of my TBR piles that I’d purchased a few years back while visiting Yellowstone National Park. Nonfiction is not my thing but I loved Terry Tempest Williams’ book Refuge and she is mentioned twice on the back cover blurbs. I’m sure that’s what inspired me to purchase Renee’s book at the Yellowstone gift shop. I’m more than 1/2 way through and I love her story. It makes me feel a little guilty because while I was goofing around in Denver, Co, causing trouble, going to Dead shows, Askins was living her passion, striving and working hard to reintroduce wolves back into Yellowstone. A life well-lived. My passion came later; a late bloomer as my mother loves to say. If you love being in nature, the call of the wild, I highly recommend both books!

Have a good week. We’ve got some changes happening here at our home/sanctuary and I feel I’m going to feel 1000 % percent better when it happens. Ciao!

To the bright edge of the world by Eowyn Ivey

Eowyn Ivey’s writing is flawless just as it was in her debut novel, The Snow Child. I treasured reading each entry as I became more connected to the characters.

Colonel Forrester’s journey takes him away from his new bride, Sophie, and into the Alaskan wilderness to gather information about Native tribes and the land. Sophie had planned to go until she finds out days before departure that she is pregnant and won’t be able to make the trip. She is devastated but manages to find herself deeply immersed in photography and bird-watching. The book is told in alternating diary entry format with Col. Forrester, Lieut. Pruitt, photographer for the journey, and Sophie back in Vancouver at the barracks sharing with us in 1885 and Josh, Alaskan Native historian and Walt, Col. Forrester’s great-nephew who is interested in preserving artifacts from the trip that have been left in his possession in present day.

The expedition is far tougher than any could have predicted; both for Sophie and the Colonel and his men. Ivey’s words far outweigh my ramblings on the topic so let me share just a few passages so you may know the beauty of this historical novel.

Sophie Forrester
January 6, 1885

Oh, such amazing news! The General has granted permission so that I will accompany Allen and his men on the steamer north! for days now it has seemed increasingly unlikely, and I am certain it was only Allen’s steady, persistent resolve that has won me passage. Of course, I go only as far as Sitka and will return to the barracks the end of February; I will not even set eyes on the northern mainland where their true adventure will begin, but I am thrilled all the same. (17)

Lieut. Col. Allen Forrester
April 7, 1885

Like a salve to me, her letter. I waited as long as I might, but after this hard day of travel, I needed the comfort of her words.
For two months, I have carried this letter unopened in my breast pocket, yet I swear the pages are still touched by her fragrance. To read those words, written in her hand. ‘Our child.’

Sophie Forrester
May 14, 1885

I have been thinking of light, the way it collected in the rain drops that morning I was so full of joy, and the way it shifts and moves in unexpected ways, so that at times this cabin is dark and cool and the next filled with golden warmth.
Father spoke of a light that is older than the stars, a divine light that is fleeting yet always present if only one could recognize it. It pours in and out of the souls of the living and dead, gathers in the quiet places in the forest, and on occasion, might reveal itself in the rarest of true art. (202)

I could go on with many beautiful quotes from the text illuminating her perfect words. Ivey’s books thrill me and I will happily recommend to all my book-loving friends. I anxiously await what ever she brings next. To the bright edge of the world I will follow…

Happy Father's Day…to all dads

Dear Dad;

You’d be so happy to see how all your children have turned out. Well maybe; we might have happy separate lives but a few of us don’t have much of a relationship. You would have worked hard to help us mend that because you had faith in family. You knew it was important to let the little things go and the big things to because no matter what family is family and they are your first source for love.

Grandkids are good too. You’d be proud of Tristan at University of Iowa, studying and applying himself to make a difference. His major is political science and you would have loved to talk current events with him. He has a real handle on how the world is and loves discussing the bigger picture. My Groovy Teen (the artist formerly known as Groovy Girl) begins 10th grade in the fall. She is a bright light, a dancer, a imaginative thinker, a designer, a friend, a messy multi-tasker, a foodie, and struggles with her idea of perfection. You’d be beyond proud of Kaylee; she still shines in photos and is making it in the big city! She is thoughtful, loves theatre, has an amazing sense of humor, and writes and interviews like a pro. Her posts, tweets, and podcasts keep us all amused.

I’ve talked many times about how much I miss you as evidenced by this Father’s Day post from 2010 and 2016 version and this birthday post from 2016. You are missed. Damn that cancer.

Today as we celebrate my husband with a delicious brunch I’ll be thinking of you, wishing you were here at the table with us, touching my hair, and throwing me that smile that tells me everything is going to be okay.

29 days of book love…

Kate DiCamillo

Simply Kate

Beautiful writing

Everything by Kate

This is how my students and I speak of DiCamillo and her books. I pretty much read them in order because that’s how they came out for me but my school kids read them in any which order and they recommend them to each other. Teachers read them aloud and when I say a title the kids collectively swoon, as in “OOOhhhh, Mrs. Tjaden read that to us last year…AAhhhh, it was soooo goooood!” I’ve heard she has a new one just out. I’m sure we’ll love that one as well.

1. Because of Winn-Dixie (2000): Girl and her lovable adopted dog.
2. Tiger Rising (2001): Rob and Sistine make memories with a tiger.
3. The Tale of Despereaux (2003): Mouse + Princess Pea =charming!
4. Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane (2006): Stuffed rabbit journey.
5. The Magician’s Elephant (2009): Peter takes an unexpected chance.
6. Bink and Gollie (2010): Adorable quirky friends, easy reader style.
7. Flora and Ulysses (2013): Flora Belle and a squirrel, yes, for real.

Everyone should read Kate; you will be transported into whatever world she has created.